Short Story #1

 

Her Eyes

“What are you doing?” she asked without moving her eyes up from the novel in her hands.  I was sitting at the table behind the sofa staring at sun glistening off her golden hair.  Tracing over every inch of her face with my eyes, memorizing every freckle and crevice placed on her face.  I have her memorized, down to every small detail on her body.  I can see every detail perfectly when I close my eyes.

I love watching her read.  She always gets lost and falls into this imaginary fantasy world inside her head that she finds in every book.

“Just thinking, Chloe,” I responded smiling.  She looked up and smirked at me.  The sunlight hit her hazel eyes just perfect for the gold to shimmer.  The wind blew in from the back doors that we always kept open, and her hair blew itself behind her shoulders leaving her face free for my eyes to see.

The smirk never left her lips while she said, “Parker, I can feel you staring at me!” laughing a little, “It’s so hard to focus.”  I couldn’t help but blush and quickly take my eyes to the scene outside the window and take a sip of my water.

“I’m sorry babe,” I said looking at nothing but outside the window “you’re just so damn beautiful.”  She didn’t say anything to me, she just looked back down at her book.  I let out a sigh and stood up from the table.  The sound of the chair sliding on the hard wood floor was so much louder than the sound of the sun peering in from the windows and doors.  I began to wash my cup.  It is crazy how much I think about when I’m washing dishes.  It’s almost therapeutic for me. As I reached for the towel to dry my clean cup, I felt the warmth of Chloe’s hands wrapping around my waist.

She whispered so delicately into my ear, “I’m sorry, baby.”  I could tell she was on her tippy toes because the top of her head only reaches my shoulders.  As I put the glass down, I felt her heels hit the ground and she pressed her body into my hugging me as tight as she could.  I turned around as she started explaining how lost she gets in the world of books she reads.  I picked her up, sat her on the counter, and put my hands down flat on either side of her hips.  Her hands started reaching for the back side of my neck, and he legs started reaching for the backside of my hips.

“Chloe,” I said. She suddenly stopped herself from grabbing onto me.

“Parker,” she said as her limbs dropped and her face filled with concern.

“Chloe, there is something I have to talk to you about.”  She scooted herself further back onto the counter so the backside of her knees met the edge.  I could tell a million things were running through her mind.  I could see the panic in her face.  I slid both my hands behind her back and pulled her into me.  It amazes me how her head always fits perfectly in the crook of my neck.

“What’s up, baby?” she asked me and her voice was trembling.  I put my hands on her shoulders and pulled her off my chest.  Her jaw was clinching and I could feel how tense she was in my hands.

I moved my hands so they fit perfects around her ears and my fingers were tangled in her hair holding the back of her neck.  I pressed my lips gently onto hers, and kept them there. I waited until I could feel her relax. I waited until she kissed me back.  She finally pushed her lips back.  My hands were still tangled in her hair, holding her.  I moved my hands to her waist and picked her up off the counter.

The sun was starting to set.  I couldn’t tell what was more piercing, the sun beaming in through the windows or her eyes beaming into mine.

“Parker, talk to me.” She demanded.  Her face was stern, but beautiful.  I’ve never seen any other human in my life that took my breath away as much as she does. Every time I look at her, I’m amazed.

“Chloe, baby,” I managed to get out.

She took a step back, and sternly let out, “Parker, what? Talk to me!”

I gently reached for her face, and kissed her. I could feel how annoyed she was, but she kissed me back.  She wrapped her arm around the back of my neck and kissed me back hard. I started smiling, and she pulled away quickly.  She smiled and looked deep into my eyes.  Her eyes were the only thing I ever wanted to look into again.  I could barely breathe, but I knew in that moment..

“I love you.”

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Poem #1

she heard the sounds around her
of the words people were speaking,
But she wasn’t listening to the words,
they didn’t matter to her.
she wasn’t lost in her own world,
But merely discovering.
Finding the things that spoke to her.
The things that touched deep into her soul.
she loved new things.
Trying new things, finding new places.
But there was no room in her heart,
no more room for people.
she’d been hurt, crushed, and left
by too many new people.
But she didn’t care about the pain,
not one bit at all.
she knew that all people need is love.
she didn’t give those people
the kind of love they needed.
and that was perfectly okay.
she loved her world,
her world was full of adventure.
her world was full of passion
her world was full of her.

XO-R

Monumental Moments

I’ve heard people talk about how good things can come out of terrible situations.  Well, yesterday was total crap. Clearly, I wrote the saddest blog post I have ever written, but it’s good to share your emotions, right? Yeah, we can just go with that.  Anyways! Last night I did something that scares me intensely.  I played that song that was making me cry yesterday, all by myself in front of my roommates.  It may sound silly, but I conquered a fear for a song with the help of my two incredible roommates singing the song with me before I sang alone and some extra courage.

Thinking about how those moments lead up to me singing in front of my friends, I know it would have never happened without everything that happened yesterday.  I wouldn’t have said anything to them about me learning a song, if I hadn’t learned the song. I wouldn’t have learned the song if I hadn’t woken up from my nap incredibly sad. and I wouldn’t have taken a nap if I hadn’t gotten an intense migraine.  So to end this annoying list of events, all these little “bad” moments of my day add up to the monumental moment of me singing infront my roommates.

Music is something that I am intensely passionate about, so I don’t know why I get so nervous to sing in front of people.  Maybe it’s because I’m scared of people thinking I’m a bad singer, maybe it’s because I’m not totally confident in my own singing.  Who knows. But that monumental  moment, changed my view of me singing infront of people.  It’s an amazing feeling.

Hope I can sing for all you internet people soon.

XO
-R

7 Feet Deep

Here I am, sitting in the library, staring at my planner full of lists of things I need to get done.  I’ve found myself here. My sweet happy place of writing to the online world about what’s going on in this little head of mine.

I’m stuck though, in a standstill watching the world keep turning around me.  That sounds extrememly cliche and depressing, but I can’t describe it any other way.  I’m surrounded by people that care about me and love me, but I feel so alone.  Maybe I just want to be alone? Those things that normally bring my joy aren’t.  Those things that help me escape, just aren’t doing the trick.
For example, I sing and I play the guitar.  To put it in perspective my guitar goes and in hand with my journal when it comes to taking care of my well being.  I just spent the last two hours learning a song.  I had a little trouble changing chords midstrum, and I started crying! Crying out of frustrating of not being to switch between two simple chords.  Now, normally I would just laugh at myself for not getting right away, but for some reason I lost it!

So this rut I am stuck in is clearly taking a mental toll on this normally happy girl.  I think I maybe need a spiritual cleanse or something. Maybe I need to go on a crazy adventure.

Well, I don’t want to bother your day too much with some depressing rant of this awkwardly rough time in my life.  If you have any ideas, at this point I’m up to try anything!

Xo
-R